Furry avatars of doom

Ah but we did kinda* learn, the perils of wiping out the cat population;- Warning Aviation content;- Operation Cat Drop;-



In the 1960’s a Cat parachute regiment recruited, equipped, sent to war against the nasty old rats.

Holy moly, did I just type that?

* well it was all started by excessive use of DDT

Operation Cat Drop was initiated to stop a plague of rats which was the result of tens of thousands of cats dying from eating lizards that contained high concentrations of DDT. The lizards became feeble due to the DDT in their systems which rendered them easy prey. The domino effect started by the application of DDT is stated in a National Institutes of Health article

Easy is unhealthy. Keep that b/w your pointy ears, you bad kitty.
 
How about this, “F D C Willard the Cat” coauthored a Scientific paper entitled "Two-, Three-, and Four-Atom Exchange Effects in bcc ³He" and written, was accepted by the Physical Review and published in number 35 (November 1975). Later, another essay appeared, this time solely authored by F. D. C. Willard, entitled "L'hélium 3 solide. Un antiferromagnétique nucléaire", published (in French) in September 1980 in the French popular science magazine La Recherche. He signed it with a paw print which didn’t stop its peer review and acceptance.

 
they are quite intelligent

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Cardboard have force of attraction on cats
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even the big ones...
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Presently have no cats, but during my childhood we got a whole bunch of them for the best part of the 1990's decade. Up to three at the same time. And since I was a mischievous brat and my elder sister was hardly better... imagine a trio of Bart, Lisa and Snowball(s) except more wicked.

My mother was growing vegetables in her garden to help with my dad lone salary, ok ? well, every single time she plowed the soil to plant vegetable, one of the cats invariably came shitting into the fresh soil. There were cases where the thing smelled so horribly, she had to retreat - baffled.

And then were birth control pills - for cats. The horrible things.
At some point we had three generation of female cats (did I said - pussies ? no, I didn't). My mom used to hide the pill into some meat for the cats to swallow it.
The oldest cat was the smartest and usually ate the food and spat the pill.
The two younger were dumb and ate the pill - only for the pills to drove them crazy, I swear - like goddam meth or cocaine, they turned addicts.
The middle-aged mom cat turned cold turkey and chased my mom until she got her pill. She attacked, meowed night and day, jumped from the balcony... pure madness.

Another weird side effect was the mother and daughter cats turning incestuous lesbians in the shape of a 69. And my mom is a (moderately and realistic) old school conservative catholic stuck in General De Gaulle late era of the 1960's. You guess she was a bit shocked to see the cats acting like this.

Myself and my sister were ROTFLMAO when we heard my mom ranting "Oh gosh no, the cat have turned lesbian again, goddam pills !"

And then were the endless pranks my sister and I played on the cats. We never, ever hurt them physically - because we loved them. The real damage was at the psychological level. I can say I ruined a cat mental health - we ended in a weird love-hate relationship. My elder sister had a theory that the cat was kind of masochistic, kind of.

We were feeding the cats with our food scraps. While the family was dinning in the kitchen, the cats sat on the window outside, patiently waiting we finished. When we got up with the food scrap in the plate, the cats ran to the house rear door. If they weren't already there (and they usually won the race) we called them banging a fork on the plate - ding ding ding. This was Pavovlian conditioning cranked past 11. To the point that - if you ding ding a plate anytime, anywhere, the cats ran at you waiting for the food.

We also did that for the hens and the rooster, and I swear it worked fine - despite their minuscule brains (ever watched Chicken run ?)

Ever seen that pied piper with all the rats in tow ? I did the same with the cats once, just ding ding a fork on a plate. They followed me, so I walked around the house three times - before feeding them the food scraps. I could have walked a hundred miles just ding ding ding the plate, the idiots would have followed me waiting for the food in the plate.

The good old days...
 
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And then were birth control pills - for cats. The horrible things.
At some point we had three generation of female cats (did I said - pussies ? no, I didn't). My mom used to hide the pill into some meat for the cats to swallow it.
The oldest cat was the smartest and usually ate the food and spat the pill.
The two younger were dumb and ate the pill - only for the pills to drove them crazy, I swear - like goddam meth or cocaine, they turned addicts.
The middle-aged mom cat turned cold turkey and chased my mom until she got her pill. She attacked, meowed night and day, jumped from the balcony... pure madness.
c235327da79f1cfa85147df8d70dcd10.jpg
 
ROTFLMAO spot on.

Cats are weird creatures, really. We didn't wanted them in the house, because countryside cats are quite dirty. So we tried teaching them - DO NOT ENTER THE HOUSE. We tried menace, shouting, throwing them outside, small slaps (we were not cruel or sadistic, we loved our cats sincerely).
It didn't worked. Still, one of the female cat made her own interpretation of the rule.
As soon as one door opened, she would enter the house, cross it and run to the next (closed) door. After what she would wait there, flattened in submission, meowing and looking at you with puppy eyes
- kind of saying
"Yeah, sure, I entered the house. But see, here I am, at the other door. You just have to open that fucking door and I will get out imediately. There is no point in getting angry."

Oh cats, really.
 
I did all kind of psychological harassment to our cats. For example I took the cat in my arms and rocked her like a baby, waltzing and whistling Johan Strauss waltzes (blame Looney Toons for that). She didn't liked it at all, and the game was to get her growling in anger - until she snapped, and then throw her to the ground. Got my share of scratches, TBH.

I also found she didn't liked when I did Nelson Muntz HAAAAA HAAAA !! in her ears. Human giggling, she couldn't stand the noise.

Another day we played flute into the cat ears. It drove her crazy. That was cruel, I readily admit it. We never, ever did it again.

Another time, we put two cats that didn't really appreciated each other, under a large plastic basin. And thus we got a moving basin which growled in anger.

Then there was this memorable moment when the two female cats - old mother and daughter - turned pregnant at the same time. Mother got her litter first, delivered six kittens, where ? in the old pram in the attic. Only some days later, time for her daughter, and where did the idiot went ? to the same pram, already with seven cats. So we had a pram packed full with female cats and two litters. Dear God. It was like an invasion.

One of our (rare) male cats, that idiot, fell into our neighbourgh open sceptic tank. Now, go try cleaning a cat covered in smelly human shit. My mome tried throwing it into a basin with soap - you guess it didn't went too well.

The same idiot cat, we had made a twined roast and took great pain in hidding the twine (or the tie, or rope, you get the point) deep at the bottom of the trash bin. Well, cats being cats, the idiot found it and ate it.
I will forever remember the weird vision of a cat having two tails instead of one. You guess, he had tried to shit the tie, but had not fully suceeded, so it was sticking out of his ass, poor thing. The cat vanished for a couple of day but when he came back, he had done it and lived to tell the tale.
Must have hurt like hell, it was lucky not to have some intestinal blockage.

We made a very silly mistake when our cats tasted, and became completely addicted, to Friskies / Whiskas cat food - and afterwards snubbed less expensive brands. It was total war that lasted for weeks - between humans unwilling to spend too much money on expensive brands, and cats snubbing the least expensive ones. We humans won that one, but it was hard fought battle.

Oh gosh, and the last cat we had, a pitch black female we called liquorice (reglisse) ended trapped into our home brand new roof insulation.
She had wanted to take her usual path below the roof, sneaked below the new insulation, and got herself unable to turn back. So she moved forward and forward until well, she was trapped against a wall. My mom heard some weird noise and got a brilliant intuition that saved that cat. She managed to save the badly deshydrated animal, which fully recovered after something akin to an epileptic crisis.

Then again, that cat must have been brain damaged from birth, as my mom once noticed it fought her garden eggplants. Yes, eggplants.

Another dumbarse cat noticed my mom had traps to catch moles in the garden. It took one of the moles - not dead - and buried it, where ? in front of the house - where it promptly destroyed the lawn, turning it into a battleground with craters everywhere.

Another cat who didn't wanted to be annoyed by we evil kids, found a radical solution: it farted first, and then we didn't got the message, shit on us. Cat farts are complete hell, I swear.

The first cat we got in 1991, we played with it on weekends so much, my mom later told us she never saw it on mondays when we were at shool. The cat needed to recover from those weekends and slept all mondays long.

On a sadder note, countryside life is hard for cats. We lost a trio of them eaten by our neighbourgh dogs - because those idiot cats stole their dog food (facepalm) - or tried so and lost. Other cats simply vanished without a trace, and I learned much later that hunters shot them dead without warning: because they ate rabbits and other small animals - hence they are seen as a pestiferous competing vermine... one riffle shot can cut a cat in half, and some hunters openly brags about that "feat". Fuck them.
 
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Also I found that if I gently kicked a cat rump with my shoe while it was eating, it growled in anger but would keep eating nonetheless.
So it made a weird noise that amused me to no end MEEEEOOOOWGNARPGNARPMEOOOOOOOOOOOOWGNARPGNARP. and since I was a devilish brat... I LMAO and carried on.

I was also quite good at meeeoooowing like male cats in love calling females. Also the crazy screams when they fight angrily. Always cracks me up in laughter, and my 8 old kid too. MEEEEOOOOOOOWMEOOOOEEEEEEEEEEW !!!!
 
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Also I found that if I gently kicked a cat rump with my shoe while it was eating, it growled in anger but would keep eating nonetheless.
So it made a weird noise that amused me to no end MEEEEOOOOWGNARPGNARPMEOOOOOOOOOOOOWGNARPGNARP. and since I was a devilish brat... I LMAO and carried on.

I was also quite good at meeeoooowing like male cats in love calling females. Also the crazy screams when they fight angrily. Always cracks me up in laughter, and my 8 old kid too. MEEEEOOOOOOOWMEOOOOEEEEEEEEEEW !!!!
Cats are sentient, intelligent beings, and kicking them just for your own fun and entertainment really is no laughing matter. You might want to study https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_welfare_and_rights_in_France ,,,
 
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- that was 25 years ago
- kicked ain't the correct word, as it gives the impression I kicked the poor thing like a soccer ball. Which wasn't the case. English not my native language.
In passing, I mentionned the fact I wasn't always nice with the cats. Wouldn't do that nowadays (that, and some other things - the 1990's were a personal hell, no nostalgia whatsoever. Real life started in 2000, aged 18, when I left home for University. But that's another story).

Even today, aged 40 and with a 8 year old kid, I'm still so heartbroken about all the cats tragically lost during my childhood, I can't decided whether having a cat again - for fear of losing it, even if the context is 100% different.
I can't imagine my kid being heartbroken if the cat vanish, as I was 30 years ago. I can't even stand the thought.

This is a major debate with my wife.
 
- that was 25 years ago
- kicked ain't the correct word, as it gives the impression I kicked the poor thing like a soccer ball. Which wasn't the case. English not my native language.
In passing, I mentionned the fact I wasn't always nice with the cats. Wouldn't do that nowadays (that, and some other things - the 1990's were a personal hell, no nostalgia whatsoever. Real life started in 2000, aged 18, when I left home for University. But that's another story).

Even today, aged 40 and with a 8 year old kid, I'm still so heartbroken about all the cats tragically lost during my childhood, I can't decided whether having a cat again - for fear of losing it, even if the context is 100% different.
I can't imagine my kid being heartbroken if the cat vanish, as I was 30 years ago. I can't even stand the thought.

This is a major debate with my wife.
Being 61 years old and over time having lost loved ones, I can trivially, stereotypically tell you that loss is a part of life. Still, to paraphrase The Bard, in my view it is better to have had someone/something you cherish in your life and have lost them than never have had them being part of your life at all. A cat in the animal shelter closest to you will thank you (though they may have rather unique ways to express their gratefulness).
 
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And then were birth control pills - for cats. The horrible things.
At some point we had three generation of female cats (did I said - pussies ? no, I didn't). My mom used to hide the pill into some meat for the cats to swallow it.
The oldest cat was the smartest and usually ate the food and spat the pill.
The two younger were dumb and ate the pill - only for the pills to drove them crazy, I swear - like goddam meth or cocaine, they turned addicts.
The middle-aged mom cat turned cold turkey and chased my mom until she got her pill. She attacked, meowed night and day, jumped from the balcony... pure madness.
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