Military Orion article and criticism

[bobbymike]

http://www.defenceaviation.com/2013/04/usaf-nuclear-powered-doomsday-machines.html?utm_content=buffer064b1&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer

 

[Orionblamblam]

Errrmmm...

In 1955, NACA (later to be known as NASA) was working on a nuclear-powered spaceship for trips to near-Earth orbit up to interstellar travel to neighboring star systems like Alpha Centauri. Nonetheless, the United States Air Force gotten involved in the Project Orion program which they’ve wanted it spacecraft to deliver satellites and crew members to orbiting space stations.

 

[J.A.W.]

Ye Gods.. .. Ah.. by any chance was it ex-Nazi scientists that proposed this stuff?

(See posts # 48 & #50 in the 'Nazi UFO thread' - in the Bar - for uncanny fictional representations..)

& add the `70s 'disaster' movie 'Meteor' ( & 'Space Cowboys') to the general theme like-wise..

 

[Moose]

Ye Gods.. .. Ah.. by any chance was it ex-Nazi scientists that proposed this stuff?

(See posts # 48 & #50 in the 'Nazi UFO thread' - in the Bar - for uncanny fictional representations..)

& add the `70s 'disaster' movie 'Meteor' ( & 'Space Cowboys') to the general theme like-wise..

Stanislaw Ulam was both Polish and Jewish, I think he'd take exception with being associated with the Nazi party. Freeman Dyson was in the RAF during WW2.

 

[J.A.W.]

Ye Gods.. .. Ah.. by any chance was it ex-Nazi scientists that proposed this stuff?

(See posts # 48 & #50 in the 'Nazi UFO thread' - in the Bar - for uncanny fictional representations..)

& add the `70s 'disaster' movie 'Meteor' ( & 'Space Cowboys') to the general theme like-wise..

Stanislaw Ulam was both Polish and Jewish, I think he'd take exception with being associated with the Nazi party. Freeman Dyson was in the RAF during WW2.

& E. Teller was of Austro-Hungarian Jewish origin too, but I doubt any of these ex-European scientists had
problematic political issues (except security matters) -when working for the US post-war on these type of projects..

 

[Hanse]

Errrmmm...

In 1955, NACA (later to be known as NASA) was working on a nuclear-powered spaceship for trips to near-Earth orbit up to interstellar travel to neighboring star systems like Alpha Centauri. Nonetheless, the United States Air Force gotten involved in the Project Orion program which they’ve wanted it spacecraft to deliver satellites and crew members to orbiting space stations.

Apparently the blog writer snagged all your pics and didn't bother to read any of your text.

 

[Orionblamblam]

Apparently the blog writer snagged all your pics and didn't bother to read any of your text.

What's new. Reading is hard, after all... critical thinking even more so.

 

[Stormshadow2186]

Hi, my is Ronnie Serrano and I'm the writer of the article. I'm trying to get into defense writing and wanted to write about the Project Orion and SLAM program because they are fascinating too me. This is volunteer and practice article and I'm not getting paid for it at all. Also, I'm very sorry for not crediting the photos and apologize for that. Like I said; this is practice article and getting data about both programs are hard to get. However, I'm going to revised the article along with adding credits to the photos soon and like I said, I'm very sorry about that.

 

[overscan (PaulMM)]

The article is full of odd syntax and mistakes, it seems like perhaps English is not your first language. Did you get anyone to proofread it?

 

[Stormshadow2186]

The article is full of odd syntax and mistakes, it seems like perhaps English is not your first language. Did you get anyone to proofread it?

Nah, my English is first language, but I do agree with you that I did sort rushed it and had no one proofreading it. Even though people liked the article, I did get some complaints about the mistakes and overused words. The photos were put were in wrong way since my friend who uploaded it did it for me. Like I said; I do apologize for not crediting you guys for the photos, but I didn't know who to credit. Nowadays, I have someone proofreading them along with crediting the photos and adding sources to my future articles since I have been taking a hiatus from writing lately. I will revise the Project Orion and Project SLAM article since I found some additional data from the Project Orion: Atomic Spaceship book since before I didn't have the book before along with fixing mistakes and adding credit to the photos. Either way, I do thank you guys on this site for information because there was little to nothing on the info about Project Orion orbital battleship.

 

[Orionblamblam]

Nah, my English is first language...

 

[Stormshadow2186]

I just find it funny that I apologize about the mistakes and now you're trash talking me.

 

[overscan (PaulMM)]

Apologies if you feel that way, if you feel up to constructive criticism:

Nah, my English is first language, but I do agree with you that I did sort rushed it and had no one proofreading it. Even though people liked the article, I did get some complaints about the mistakes and overused words. The photos were put were in wrong way since my friend who uploaded it did it for me. Like I said; I do apologize for not crediting you guys for the photos, but I didn't know who to credit. Nowadays, I have someone proofreading them along with crediting the photos and adding sources to my future articles since I have been taking a hiatus from writing lately. I will revise the Project Orion and Project SLAM article since I found some additional data from the Project Orion: Atomic Spaceship book since before I didn't have the book before along with fixing mistakes and adding credit to the photos. Either way, I do thank you guys on this site for information because there was little to nothing on the info about Project Orion orbital battleship.

I assume this is roughly what you meant.

No, English is my first language. I do agree with you it had some problems - I rushed the article a bit and had no one proofreading it. Even though many people liked the article, I did get some complaints about the mistakes and overused words. The photos were placed in the wrong order by my friend who uploaded the article. Like I said previously, I do apologize for not crediting you guys for the photos, but I didn't know who to credit when the article was written. I now have someone proofreading my articles, and I will be crediting photos and adding sources in future. I have been taking a break from writing lately. I will revise the Project Orion and Project SLAM article with some additional data from George Dyson's book Project Orion: Atomic Spaceship, along with fixing any mistakes and adding credits to the photos. Thanks for posting the material on this site because information about Project Orion is hard to find on the internet.

(While "taking a hiatus" is acceptable in colloquial American English, it sounds odd to me)

This kind of writing is acceptable on an internet forum I guess, though older members and grammar nazis are likely to find it somewhat incoherent. Its simply not acceptable for published journalism.

Additionally, if you want to"get into defence writing", writing worthwhile stories is not just about surfing the web for information and downloading some random pics. You need to assess your sources. Is this a real drawing or something made by a fan. Is this information first hand from a primary source or secondary source, how reliable is the source, is it Aviation Week or some dude on a forum. Is the information from source A corroborated by source B.

 

[overscan (PaulMM)]

I just find it funny that I apologize about the mistakes and now you're trash talking me.

I think Scott was amused that you managed to assert that English was your first language in such an non-idiomatic, non-native English speaker way. Maybe a little insensitive but you can see the funny side I hope.

I didn't realise the phrase "trash talking" was actually in real use, but then I'm an old git of 40 and British so I'm probably out of touch with modern American youth argot.

 

[Orionblamblam]

I think Scott was amused that you managed to assert that English was your first language in such an non-idiomatic, non-native English speaker way.

Indeed! In fact, what *immediately* popped into my mind was that that seemed like the sort of wording you might see in a press release by Best Korea describing Dear Leaders latest miracle.

Maybe a little insensitive...

Only a *little* insensitive? Damn. Must be losing my touch. I'll try harder in the future, promise!

I didn't realise the phrase "trash talking" was actually in real use

Really? Quite common, old bean. Pip pip cheerio.

 

[CJGibson]

S2186, at least you now have volunteers to proofread your material. We're actually very helpful once you get to know us.

As far as I'm concerned, everyone starts somewhere. At least the lad is having a go. He's realised he's messed up and apologised for helping himself to other folks' material and not including the credits. He'll learn from it and I'm sure his next effort, based on new research and proofread by some of the forum members, will be much better.

Stick at it, who knows where you'll end up. I'm lucky to have a very good mentor and perhaps that's what S2186 needs? Advice, rather than a boot in the baws.

Chris

 

[Orionblamblam]

He's realised he's messed up and apologised for helping himself to other folks' material and not including the credits.

Yeah, but his scribblin' skills indicate... I dunno what they indicate. Something confusing.

Advice, rather than a boot in the baws.

Everyone deserves a second chance (well, except the Jedi. Screw those guys). But that doesn't mean that those who've been swiped from are supposed to be instantly "over it."

 

[CJGibson]

Well, we've all been swiped from, me included, and in this case it wasn't exactly a successful swipe. I assume he didn't get paid for the piece, which would really piss us off.

The bloke's had his collar felt, made to look silly, been savaged and has learned his lesson (I hope). Methinks he picked the wrong subject.

Older readers might recall when Stingray was asked how old he was. He seems to have sorted himself out after annoying a few folk on the forum and being put on the straight and narrow.

I'll get me coat.

Chris

 

[Stormshadow2186]

Thanks guys. Yeah, the article was completely volunteering and no dime went to me. I was helping my friend to support his site along with practicing to better my work for my future. I have been reading and writing about military aviation and defense since I was 12 years old and even wanted to go into USAF until I was denied because of slight autism.

Nowadays, I have been slowly improving on my writing skills and will be releasing two more articles in a week, but the articles will credits, links, references, along with being proofread. I do agree with you Chris that I did sort of chose the wrong topic or should of just waited for new info on Project Orion. I understand some of you guys are sort of pissed that I didn't ask you for credits for the pictures, but I apologize big time for that and haven't did since. That's why I ask people if I can use they're pictures for my articles and I will credit them for that.

I really like this site since I found it by accident in 2007 and should of joined much earlier for you're guys advice and maybe could have helped me out and save me pain down the row. Right now, my main goal is write professional defense articles and I'm currently planning to write a book about the history of the Mexican military sometime this year.

 

[Orionblamblam]

I have been slowly improving on my writing skills

Speaking as a man who makes vast numbers of spelling and typing errors... you've got a ways to go. Your writing style comes off as that of someone still a little shaky on the proper use and functioning of the English language

 

[bobbymike]

I have been slowly improving on my writing skills

Speaking as a man who makes vast numbers of spelling and typing errors... you've got a ways to go. Your writing style comes off as that of someone still a little shaky on the proper use and functioning of the English language

I would add 'basic' use of the English language. Don't know where you are from but look online if there are any writing composition courses at community colleges or continuing adult education institutions.

Writing for publication is very demanding. I write commercial credit and financial analysis for internal corporate consumption only and have used these avenues to improve my writing skills, which still can use improvement.

 

[XP67_Moonbat]

Hey, can we leave the guy alone now and get back on topic please. Mods, can we move the writing tips to The Bar please?

 

[Madoc]

Stormshadow2186,


Well, can't say as your first impression here is a good one. Ripping off other people's work - even as a newbie and unpaid writer - seems a pretty obviously WRONG thing to do.


Have you made any attempt at fixing the lack of attribution in your piece?


A little late, yes, but it's a helluvalot better than nothing.